Stare if you Must

Is it just me, or does the entire world stop and stare when one (or both) of my boys act up in public. As soon as they start acting out, I immediately go into critical soothe mode. Anything and everything must be done to SHUT HIM UP! But then reason kicks in. And, for better or worse, I try very hard to maintain the discipline we work so hard on at home. Which means that I am all too often "that mom" in the stores. The mom that people are staring at because her kid is screaming. The mom who is giving her kids a timeout in the Home Depot parking lot. The mom who is hauling her kid, kicking and screaming, out of the grocery store to sit in the car while he cries his heart out because he would not listen to reason.

Not so long ago, a friend was complaining about a mom breezily shopping while her baby cried in the car seat. They were appalled at the mother's lack of attention being paid to the child. I wish I had been there to give that mother a little support. Because it is unlikely that she didn't care that her baby was crying. She probably knew that nothing she could do would soothe the baby at that point. And she was most likely trying to get in and out of that store as quickly as humanly possible.

And then there was the time that my companion complained about the mother who wasn't doing anything to control her kids during a flight. I saw a mom that was travelling alone with 3 small children. This was long before I had any children. Today, I would ask the mom if she wanted me to hold her baby for a bit so she could get a break. Back then, I could only think to offer what I hoped was a supportive smile.

I would give anything for a supportive smile some days. Instead of the evil eye because I dared put my children on leashes. It was not my intention to "walk" them like dogs. But rather, I was hoping that if my one year old twins were not willing to hold my hand that I would have a measure of safety in the very large and crowded museum. Admittedly, it didn't work. They strained at their leashes, in opposite directions of course, and we never got anywhere. And I put them, kicking and screaming, back in their strollers. And then we practiced walking nicely in the house for months before we tried it out of the house again.

I don't believe there is one right way to do things. And I am willing to listen to your point of view. But in the end, I am going to make the choices that I feel are right for my kids. And if that means that you are going to stare at me while I try to gain control of the situation, then bring it on!